(Composed By Rabee Natan a”h – From His Work, Likutei Tefilah)
Master of the World, merciful One, Who cures those with broken hearts, You know my broken and depressed heart. Have mercy on my broken heart for it is broken to smithereens; for the thoughts of my heart are scattered and dispersed to the ends of the earth. I am really responsible for all this but I did not have bad intentions. Master of the World, You know the hidden secrets of the world, You see into the chambers of our hearts. Before You, all the hidden thoughts of the heart are revealed. You know how hard this itself is for me; it confuses and obstructs me a lot. Even if sometimes in Your great compassion You send me some words and I begin to explain to You all that is in my heart, after a while my heart becomes blocked in the middle of speaking. So also my heart suddenly becomes sealed. I do not know what to do.
You seem to hide Your face from me. You have already revealed to us that this is caused by us blemishing our faith for this is considered to be like idol worship. Now, my Father in Heaven, what can I do to atone for this? Oh, what can I do to return Your face towards me. When will I merit to pure faith so that I can speak openly before You, as if face to face, like one speaks to a friend. Help me and save me so that I can accustom myself to sigh, deep sighs from the depths of the heart about my vast distance from You because of my many sins, especially blemishes to faith. Merit me to truly feel my pain and immense suffering such that I really sigh from the depths of my heart. May my spirit be broken within me in a way that will arouse Your true compassion upon me. Open Your hand in mercy and good will and bring me back to You in repentance face to face. Father in Heaven, faithful King, G-d of faith, You know everything that happens to us and to every individual regarding holy faith.
In You great compassion, You planted Your faith within us, but because of the immense number of our sins we still get thoughts of blasphemy. This is the main cause of our distance from You. It causes a concealment of Your face, which is the greatest of all our troubles and distress. Guard us and protect us from now on from all sorts of disbelief and blasphemous thoughts. Rather, merit me to believe in You Hashem our G-d, in Your Holy Torah and in Your tzaddikim with total faith, a faith that is pure and perfect. May my faith be so strong that it is as if I see You, eye to eye.
By this, may fear of You be on my face; let me feel shame, so that I will never sin again nor blemish in any way. Let awe, dread and fear of You, with great shame, descend upon me immediately knowing that You stand over me, and see my every deed, at all times and at every moment. And merit me, through the strength of my holy belief, to pray, plead and speak openly before You with all my heart and with proper thoughts. Let my mind be connected firmly to the words of prayer without any extraneous thoughts and may all my words and conversations with You be as if face to face, like someone speaking to his friend. Have mercy upon me like a father over his son. Save me on every occasion by all kinds of salvation. May You be blessed forever. Amen and Amen